Tuesday, April 3, 2018
I feel like I sacrifice so much time with the crew. That's why breaks are so important. My squad gets all my time and I get to relax. Today is day 2/5. It's 9:20 am. I'm in bed. It's glorious!
Astronaut and princess left because they are teenagers and have lives. Just kidding! They are with their grandparents. Nerds. Yesterday, I had breakfast with mechanic bae & squirrel, took squirrel to 2 doctor appointments, helped the little girls clean their room, helped side salad go through his clothes and weed out the small stuff, had lunch with them at Chickfila, saw a movie ("Coco"), did laundry, and went to bed at a reasonable hour.
It's like my SAHM days, but temporary and paid. Today, I'm going to do more laundry-it never ends in a family of 7-and consider taking the kids to the pool. I organized my closet this past weekend.
I loved being able to do things with my crew but I don't think I'd want to be a SAHM now. For one, I have no kids at home. They are all in school now. It's kind of purposes when they are this age. Also, I truly LOVE my career, my students, and my school. The balance part is hard, though. I leave before most of the kids. There are days when I don't get off until 6:30 or 7. I don't get to chaperone field trips and I miss programs. It's stressful, too. Extremely stressful . But it adds a different type of value to my life.
In a perfect world, I would have a job with equal pay but half the hours and twice the flexibility.
So in my quest to create lasting memories as well as do things I want to do, regardless of the opinions of others, we went camping.
It. Was. Awesome.
I had a lot of reservations. What do we need? Where do we go? How do we do it. And I'm not particularly close to anyone that is a camper. I like I know some people But I don't *know* them.
Luckily, the SC State Park system employees a crack team of mind readers and created a program called the Palmetto Campout . Apparently, it's been going on like a whole decade but who knew? [Actually, a friend of mine posted about it on Facebook and I stalked the park people until registration opened.]
So I applied and.....we got accepted! I paid my registration fee ($50) and now we're campers!
Thursday, July 21, 2016
Let's do the math:
- Normal=30-40 mL
- Heavy=60-80 mL
- Me=200+ mL
The thing is, I knew it was bad but I couldn't quantify how bad until I had the Diva Cup.
There are other issues, possibly caused by the devil's matchstick. I lost a LOT of weight. Double edged sword: I'm definitely toting extra pounds but I'm really getting questionable. Y'all know how people get when you lose weight. I developed fibroid tumors. I'm too young for fibroids. And my uterine tissue is going rogue. I've developed a condition called adenomyosis. Basically, my uterine tissue is growing into the walks of my uterus .
It hurts. The cure is a hysterectomy . Mine isn't bad, though, and we're going to see if it progresses after the demon splinter is gone and reassess the situation then.
So my doc and I agreed it had to come out and out it came.
Have you tried Nexplanon or Diva Cup for that matter? What were your experiences like?
Monday, June 20, 2016
This post is a bit more honest than most, a bit darker.
I'm struggling right now. Mentally amd emotionally. I'm really not sure how much I more I can take.
I don't know how to explain it exactly because I have so much to be happy about, proud of. I have 5 wonderful children, a career I love, enough of everything.
Yet, I'm not happy. I don't think I know how to be. Maybe I forgot. Maybe I never knew. All I know is that right now, in this moment, I feel like I am sinking. I know how to save everyone except myself and there is no one to save me.
Monday, April 25, 2016
Lettuce and I are no more. I am still sad about this because I miss being married. I miss having someone there for me, someone to share things with, someone who loves me.
Then I remember that my marriage wasn't like that.
There were good times, for sure. And beautiful children. But it was hard and ugly and painful. And at the end of the day, I made the choice that had to be made for my babies. And I survived.
Since then, I have had some other changes. For one, I finally finished that Masters I started so many years ago. It was hard but rewarding. Literally. My pay grade went up and I am [almost] middle class. I have some big plans coming up but I don't want to jinx them by saying to much. Know that this is only the beginning.
I also lost a LOT of weight. Like more than 50 pounds. "Pics or it didn't happen," you say? Well alrighty then.
I'm teaching 4th grade for the pasts 3 years. It is amazing and I love it. My kids are bonkers so we all get along. I won't say it's always fun but the good outweighs the bad, for sure.
Next up, the Astronaut...
Sunday, April 24, 2016
So much has happened.
I was reading through my older posts and reflecting on all the ways my life has changed.
It was sad. It was painful. It was liberating. It was necessary.
Side effect of the divorce. I'm totally a MILF now.
I miss being a SAHM but I love my students most days.